Saturday, September 10, 2011
Saturday, July 2, 2011
These last few years I've discovered more people like myself. I've even had people encourage me to find jobs that rely on me starting things up and getting them running well. A couple years ago, I discovered that there is a term for this - it's called being A Starter.
Being a Starter does not mean that you don't have the ability to finish things, rather, it's that you start things so that the "Worker Bees," who enjoy maintaining well running things, can take over. Being a Starter is about knowing when the starting stops and letting go.
What does that mean for me now? I'm entertaining some ideas about becoming a small office organizer. I'd go in, assess the office, help to get them running and organized, and then when it's like a well oiled machine, move on to the next office. Or something like that, that leans on my natural giftings.
It's hard to be a Starter though, in a culture that values the every day routines, the consistent work, the finishers. It may be akin to being a seed planter in Christianity - you sow, but don't reap, therefore your "success" is less measurable. I was taught that if you start something, you finish it. While that may be true for some things, it isn't true, true, to the way I work at projects. It's not that I can't finish something, but there are some things that I need to be able to let go and let others take over.
After being clearer on this Starter thing (I'm still learning to lean into it), I am more able to let go of things and not feel like I failed. On the other hand, when a new dream or idea starts, I can better manage how I go about it, knowing that this may not be something that I do for more than a year or two.
Some things that I'm recently letting go are:
- Gardening (though that may shop up again)
What if...I could do my own edition? I noticed that the most weight that they lose is in the first quarter of the weight loss, then it gets a little less. So, here's my own edition - lose 40 pounds by the end of the year.
My gosh, that sounds...like a big goal. And a little scary too, because I will be so different too - in many ways. But, it is also a good and doable challenge.
Here's the breakdown:
July - 10 pounds
August - 9 pounds
September - 8 pounds
October - 7 pounds
November - 6 pounds
= 40 pounds down
I'll give myself December off to maintain and then review in January.
The contestants also get rewards for reaching their goals. So, if I lose the 10 pounds for July, then my reward will be a complete new outfit - head to toes; shoes, clothes, accessories, lingerie, maybe even something for the hair. No new clothes before that. I don't know what the rewards will be for the other months, I'll probably set those as I go.
Weigh in is once a month, so I will have to keep myself from stepping on that scale. My weigh in this morning was _ _ 9 (you didn't think that I'd really post my weight, did you?).
Next weigh in - August 1st.
Monday, June 13, 2011
This is one of my wallpaper pics on my computer. For some reason, whenever I see it come on, it feels as if my heart opens up like one of the daisies. Maybe it's because of the bright colors and it gives off some color therapy; or because its nature-like and spring. I just want to sit and stare and it, and thought maybe you would like to as well.
P.S. I was bad this morning. Yes, I did wake up on time, but then I thought, my in-laws are coming for an overnight and I won't be able to run on Weds, so why not just do Tues-Thurs-Sat. But now my legs feel restless like they wanted me to take them for a run and now have excess energy. Sort of like my dog.
Not that I'm saying I'm a dog.
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
The plan: run a 5k at the end of October.
No, this isn't a repeat post. I'm going to do it again, though I am starting about 15 days earlier this time. Plus, I am in better shape and not passing out when I run a minute. I may want to pass out if I run 5, though. But we'll cross that line later.
This time, I'm not really going to tell anyone, it's just you that knows. I think I work better this way, so there isn't the pressure of expectations and I can come from behind like an underdog and say, "hey, I ran 2 miles this morning, I think I'm almost ready for that 5k" and THEN it'll be cool to talk about it.
The plan I wrote up is a 20 week thing (which you know I will be revising as I go) but this is different than the cookie cutter 5k programs. I took into account the times that I will be out of town. I took into account how I ran last fall and trained naturally. And then I took into account the fact that I never stick to a plan, even my own.
I start on Monday, and I will be going outside. I haven't run outside yet this spring, so I will start very slow and see how it works. My goal will be to run just 1 minute 3 times during my morning outing. And I think I may take the dog, which means an extra reason to take it easy. He isn't quite there yet for healing. But that also will mean that I need to get up earlier so that it doesn't screw him up with his feeding times.
So, my dear friend, think of me on Monday morning as I roll out of bed thinking, "dang, what did I get myself into," and roll onto the street.
Let's really hope it's not raining.
You have passed Green Hill Country.
It is 2 miles to the next landmark.
You have 433 miles to reach Rivendell.
Monday, June 6, 2011
I am going to take in my t-shirt necklaces into Urban Violet this week. She loved my necklace before I told her that I made it, and she said she'd take all I had.
I only had one made - and that one was made that morning that I brought my samples in. I had not intended to market them that day.
sounds of scurrying ensue
Over the weekend, I've made about 25, and then it came to tagging them. I did want to create a "brand" or image that involved some kind of unique crafting and something to do with India - thus Wandering Banyan Tree was born. The Banyan Tree is the national tree of India. Under its shady branches, villages had their merchant fairs, was a gathering to buy and sell things or just a cool place to chat and gather. The name Banyan in Hindi means merchant. And since I now wander between here and India, I added that adjective to make the name unique. Do you know how many businesses are called "Banyan Tree?" Google it, it's amazing. But none other has the "wandering" part that I can find.
Anyway, my fundraising for the next India trip has begun. I am hoping to sell about 10 t-shirt necklaces a month and have another lead at a different shop in town. I may even try a third shop this week as well.
You have passed Green Hill Country.
It is 4 miles to the next landmark.
You have 435 miles to reach Rivendell.
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
Today I ran a little on the treadmill. This is the first time since I had a little injury in April. I had thought that I would want to just keep walking. But my legs had other ideas - they were longing to run. And that makes sense, because running has always been one of my strong sports. I was never good at team sports, when the whole team depended on you to stand there, and hit or catch or block. Maybe I was ok with basketball except I'm short, and soccer was a good game, except we only rarely played it and there was no girls soccer team at our school then.
Instead, I went out for things that required myself to challenged such as choir and art and track for one season. It's not that I was never athletic, even though my experience with team sports may lead you to believe that. I was athletic - but not as a team player. I needed the freedom to do my best for my own self, and not think about how it affected others. And that is the truth in about anything I put my hands to whether it is following a knitting pattern or writing a blog.
To my own self be true.
There is an athlete still inside.
This week's goal - to get to the 20 mile mark by Saturday evening.
You have passed Last View of Hobbiton.
It is 1 miles to the next landmark.
You have 441 miles to reach Rivendell.
Friday, May 20, 2011
Changes I've seen lately:
- My shirt arms seem to have become longer and the shoulder seems are hanging down my arms
- Stomach continues to change in the way it carries the weight - looking like a slowly deflating tire
- The shirt I bought a few weeks ago as an incentive because it was tight when I put it on - is not so tight now. Just a little bit bulgy. I may be able to wear it come summer.
- I look and feel smaller and can see changes
You have passed Last View of Hobbiton.
It is 4 miles to the next landmark.
You have 444 miles to reach Rivendell.
Saturday, May 14, 2011
Speaking of journeys...
You have walked 13 miles.
You have passed Last View of Hobbiton.
It is 5 miles to the next landmark.
You have 445 miles to reach Rivendell.
Not so many miles logged this week, I was a bit lax. I am going to make it my goal to make it to the next landmark by Friday.
Monday, May 9, 2011
And then when we got home, I walked the dog to the back yard and the rejoicing stopped; plastic pool, bags of leaves from last fall, dead spots from moldering leaf piles and assorted debris. Yuck.
You have passed Last View of Hobbiton.
It is 8 miles to the next landmark.
You have 448 miles to reach Rivendell.
Last weekend was the annual Shepherd's Harvest Festival at Lake Elmo. 4 barns of vendors, extreme sheep makeovers, sheep dog demos, good food, lots of fun to be had.
Today, I can sit and admire the plunder of the day. I can reach into my basket and remember fondly the fun sheepy weekend, and savor the memories until next year.
You have passed Last View of Hobbiton.
It is 10 miles to the next landmark.
You have 450 miles to reach Rivendell.
Yesterday, I had plans of making my maiden voyage outside for a walk/run. I woke up to sounds of rain and thunder and hit the treadmill. I actually am enjoying walking now, not so much running. And if I do it right, I still break into a nice sweat and get my heart going. So I will continue to walk and add in a little jogging when I feel like it.
Sunday, May 8, 2011
Well, and why not. This was my first blog here on blogger, so the old is new again.
PLEASE - post that you found me here when you do.
I promise to try not to do any fancy blogging things for awhile again.
Thursday, February 24, 2011
The neat thing is, I still lost weight while away, about 3 pounds. I didn't run, didn't even have time to skip rope. Just the activity and the foods and that was it. I am well on track to lose that 20# by May 30th! Maybe even by the end of April. We shall see!
Monday, January 31, 2011
Now on one hand, I suppose you're not supposed to weight yourself every day because of fluctuations. So someone could argue that it's just water loss. On the other hand, I haven't weighed this little in over a year or more. I'm not counting on being down to this weight tomorrow, but it was so joyful to see the number on the scale!
As to what happened, I did a little investigation.
Wife: I lost another pound today.
Wife: did you mess with the scale?
Husband: smiles, kids around, but didn't do it.
Another thought came to mind. When I was reading Make the Connection, Bob Greene had said that the first week he worked with Oprah, she lost no weight. But the next week, she lost 5 pounds. He said that this can happen a bit when losing fat through diet and exercise. Your body will hold onto the weight in water that you lost, until it is ready (adjusted to the changes) to release it. I wonder if that's what's happening to me as well.
Side note: When I read that book, I thought that I couldn't do that, it would be too hard. But now, I am doing something very similar! Maybe it's time to re-read that book.
Well, whatever is happening, I am going to keep going. I have 2 more days of run/walking before I take off. And wouldn't it be nice if, during my travels, my weight continues to go down? Not that I am expecting it to. In fact, I am expecting to be up a couple pounds. But it's nice to dream.
Saturday, January 29, 2011
Why, you may ask, didn't I lose this weight before, if I could do 2 pounds in a week the week before I leave the country? Good question. My guesses are:
- I know more about fitness and weight loss now than I did last summer
- I am more motivated now than I was before
- I am working toward weight loss, not a race
- I am eating healthier and have made changes that were needed - and I am not craving the junk
Yesterday, I did a walk/run workout and pushed myself to sweat for awhile. I even ran for about 3 minutes straight (could have gone longer). And before I went to bed, the Trader Joe's milk chocolate bar was calling me to eat a square. I have had a couple small squares this last week when I craved something sweet. But I thought to myself, "self, if you eat this chocolate, it could mean the difference between your next pound lost."
That last statement is a new way of thinking for me. Instead of feeling like a kid whose mom has forbid them something good, I was making a choice between weight loss, or a sweet something. What happened to my head?! Who took over my brain?! Who is this woman, and how can I get more of her thinking?!
Anyway, back to the scale. It was *** pounds and 8 ounces, just barely under. But it's there, and it's good. I really had wanted to lose this pound before leaving for India. For one reason, I won't be able to eat as healthy while traveling, so I could sure use that "buffer" of another pound. For another reason, I wanted myself to know that I could do it. That I could come back home, after 2 weeks of semi-bad eating and not as much exercise and KNOW, really know that I CAN do it. I can lose weight by diet and exercise.
Because, I've never done this before and had success. But now I have, and I know it can be done.
Thursday, January 27, 2011
I should've known. This is Jillian Michaels, after all.
I was sweating within 3 minutes.
At one point, you could hear me saying, "I'd rather be running."
What I learned from this video, was that I am the one that has to push myself to go harder, to finish. When I've done videos before, I've always just done what I could and didn't push it. Burning calories is burning calories, right? But now, after this summer and learning more about fitness, I was ready to put it all out there for a video. There are places that I can go to if I push myself harder. And even then, I wonder if I can go harder than that. The video brought home to me all the things that I've been learning the last few months.
Then yesterday, back to running; 1 minute on, 2 minute walking. I had thoughts of 2 minute runs and 2 minute walks. And then, the plans went down the drain. My legs were fatigued almost from the first set. Yes, I was going at a faster pace, but from my run on Monday, I thought I could push myself more. Instead, I struggled to finish. I kept thinking, "I can stop now, I'm tired." And then the other voice responded, "just go one more set." I finished. Gotta keep listening to that second voice.
Today I'll let my body rest and then be back at it on Friday.
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Well, something, some part of running, is still there.
When I started last summer, I could barely do 30 seconds and then when I got up to 60, I couldn't do it more than 3-4 times in a session. I ended up being able to go about 10 minutes straight before feeling that lung burn.
Now, when I've started over doing 1 minute running, 2 minute walking, it's no problem, really. I've been playing with speed to make it more of a workout. Yeah, I could probably go up to the next level of 2 minute runs, but...then there's that overseas trip coming up and I may have to start over once I return.
Sidenote - but is this one of those "why wait" things again? Why wait to step it up if I can?
I'm able to do the workout without the lung burn. The difference is, I'm sweating more (see previous day's post). When I ended last fall with a 10 minute run, there was lung burn, but no sweat. Huh. I'm a bit puzzled by all of this.
Perhaps, now that I'm running to get into shape, improve my body and lose weight - rather than to train for a 5k. My focus is different. I'm focusing on getting my heart rate up, and being in that fat burning zone. I'm doing this by increasing my speed each rep, both the walk and running parts. I even increased it to a speed I hadn't been to before on the treadmill during my runs last night. It felt good, and even felt like I could go more.
So, something is there still, from my running last summer and fall. It didn't all leave and I didn't completely have to start over (even though I kind of am). And my body is ready to go again.
And I have to get over this "why wait" thing that's stuck in my head and propel my progress forward.
Monday, January 24, 2011
When I first started running and could barely go a minute without gasping for air and thinking I was going to die, I was sweaty all the time. But after awhile, when I was outside running, I hardly ever got sweaty, not even during my 5k.
Yeah, it was cooler out, so maybe it was harder to get real sweaty. But maybe not.
Another thing that I noticed was that I lost weight more when I sweated. When I was just out there running and pushing my endurance, and not sweating (and I don't know why not because I sure thought I was pushing myself), I didn't lose any weight.
My conclusion: sweat = weight loss.
It also probably means that I'm in my target heart rate. I don't have a good way to measure it, and there are so many different ways that you can find to find a "correct" one. So I'm just going by what I notice my body doing.
On Saturday, I walked and made sure to get myself up to the sweaty zone for at least 5 minutes. I did this by increasing the speed of the walk. I was almost up to running speed in walking!
BTW - the "sweaty zone" is when I am consistently perspiring; dripping down my face and other places.
This week, I'm going to work on getting into the sweaty zone for 5-10 minutes during my training sessions. This is my last full week before I leave the country for a little while! I am a bit nervous about how travel may set me back. But I am also glad to have started to get back into it now. Should make it easier when I get home.
I have been making exercising a priority. Tomorrow I have book group and they are doing the annual dinner & movie thing. Well, in order to have time to exercise, I'd have to get up early, and that probably won't happen. So I'm doing dinner only (bringing a salad that I can eat) and skipping the movie. Schedules can be worked out so that you can have a social life and get fit.
Friday, January 21, 2011
Oh, thank you for your applause and cheers! Yes, yes, it did take me awhile to get back into it. But yes, it's good to be back. I had a health scare this week, my numbers were not looking good. Which was the motivation that I needed to get back to running NOW.
As I ran/walked on the treadmill and listened to the Phedippidations podcast, I wondered, why did I want to wait to start? What possible reason was there to put off getting back into health?
It's easier not to.
The view from the couch is good.
I don't have the time now.
Why start now when I'll be out of the country for 2 weeks?
But these are really just excuses. There's no reason why I can't start now, so I did. After dinner, we finished watching Chuck and I told my husband that afterwards, I was going to exercise. It wasn't easy. It would have been so nice to sit there, watch another show, knit, and put it off until tomorrow. But I got off my butt and did it.
1 min run, 2 min walk x10, or thereabouts.
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
The treadmill workouts were like going from a 5 star restaurant to a family diner. Yes, you can still run, but there is so much less color and interest. Odd, because when I first started running outside, I was so self-conscious and wanted to hide inside. There were flirtations with workout videos and thoughts and plans for other alternatives. But this last couple of weeks I just simply started to move. And with the moving, came the truce.
Just 10 minutes of jump roping, that's all. And in the upstairs hallway, where no lights could be hit or things broken. Believe it or not, sometimes I'd sweat or get out of breath rather easily. I used to be so good at jump rope, could do 100 and be just fine. Now, I find myself tripping up quickly. But it was movement and it felt good.
This week, I've been tromping through the snow with my dog. Since I take him out at least 2 times (my hubby the other) I've been lacing up my snow boots. The snow is knee deep in places and there are layers of soft snow, crunchy snow, and all measures in between. We've made a track of sorts, breaking trails and tromping down unusual places. Just 2-3 laps at a time and I am slightly winded.
Let the snow fall!
I will tromp it down.
Let the cold winds blow!
I will jump inside
Let the winter be over soon
And I will run again.
- Get back into running starting February 28th
- Run a 5K - no walking in Sept or Oct
- Weigh less than 200 #’s by the end of the year
I will do this by:
- Following Amby Burfoot’s running plan
- Working out 3 x’s a week minimum
- Changing 1 thing in my diet each month for the better
Thursday, January 6, 2011
The issues that my heart is breaking for are for the women in third world countries. These women are infants or even in the womb, are treated as much less than equals. In the worst or sometimes best of circumstances, many girls and women find themselves as modern slaves, and most of them in the sex trade.
For many years, I have known this, yet turned my eyes away. If I couldn't see it anymore, it didn't exist in my world. Yes, I did feel bad and wondered if there were things to be done about it. But someone else was taking care of such injustice, surely.
Because this is the injustice that God spoke about. To care for widows and orphans in their distress. Jesus commanded us to do this, but what have I done to obey? Sent caring thoughts and sometimes money and then conveniently forgot.
But now, I am looking this injustice in the face and beginning to see it. It is horrible, but there is hope.
When I was reading the book, "Half the Sky," there were statistics about the Asian countries and the girls who were slaves. It suddenly hit me - that could have been me. I was an orphan in an Asian country. Were some of these women my sisters, my cousins, my aunts, and now my nieces? Was I born and taken away for such a time as this - to help them in their distress?
I don't know the answers to these questions. But I lay the burden of this at Jesus' feet. And perhaps he can show me what can be done, because I AM SURE and willing to help. My burden has become a promise.
No, I am not running!
Yes, I do feel a bit guilty about that.
No, I am not giving up totally.
After the 5k, I ran some and then when daylight savings hit, I was constantly tired and sleepy. My perfectionist mode kicked in that said, "if I can't get up early 3 mornings a week, then it's not really running."
Side note: I haven't gained any weight over the holidays. I tried to be sensible in my food choices. So this means, that the weight I lost in running, was true weight loss.
Now, after the holidays, it's time to regroup. I recall that when I first started, I ran in the afternoons or even the evenings. When I started to feel more awake and healthier, I got up in the mornings. I have started to exercise in the evenings again. As someone once said, the best time to exercise is when you have time.
Note the word "exercise." I haven't worked up to running yet. I've done some treadmill walking and last night I did some jump roping. 10 minutes of that was a workout. What I like about jump roping is that I don't need to change clothes or even put shoes on, I can just grab the rope and do it wherever. I am also using more of my body in this one exercise.
The idea for the rope came when I started to think about my upcoming trip to India. The places that I'll be traveling are not safe for women to go running around alone in. So with a jump rope, I'll be able to do that anywhere, and can do even 10 minute segments and stay active.
After I return home, it will be more warm out and I'll be putting together another running plan. I already think I know what I'll do - Amby Burfoot's plan. It's a nice, no pressure one that is a bit lengthier than the C25k. In the fall, I WILL do another 5k and run all or most of it.
Will it be a barefoot runner?
A Chi runner?
A Pose Runner?
A person who just gets out there when she can and does whatever she can?
Tune in and find out.
- I learned the Babysteps of Flying
- I made making my bed each morning a habit. Even though it's not perfect, it looks nicer
- I am doing a load of laundry each day, as needed. No more clean clothes on the couch waiting to be folded. I have to have the time to do a load or I won't start one.
- The upstairs living room was decuttered
- The upstairs closet was decluttered
- The kitchen was decluttered
- We had a stress-free Thanksgiving hosting because of Flying
- We had a delightful garage sale, getting rid of stuff
- We got rid of over 30 boxes of stuff to charity (mostly after the sale)
In 2011 I will:
- Continue decluttering the house
- Bless others with or extras
- Work towards working at home
- Develop more Flying habits
Here’s what a day looks likes:
- Make bed
- 1 load of laundry
- Empty purse & bags after work (this is a big issue for me)
- Exercise/swish & swipe/dry mop, depending on day
- Change sheets/clean fridge/desk time, dust, vacuumdepending on day
- 2 minute hot spot
- 15 minute declutter
Check calendar & thaw meat
Take meds if needed
Whew - it feels a lot lighter and much more doable! We’ll see how this goes for this month, and then I leave the country for 15 days! May have to regroup after that with some crisis cleaning at the end of February.
Sunday, January 2, 2011
I am done with chasing them, it's time to take out the butterfly net and catch one or two. If I merely say to myself that I'll chase dreams, it is too vague of statement and gives no direction. But to catch something - that takes planning, action and a solid goal.
A little while ago, I felt restless at work. This is my usual modus operandi - after a few years, the challenge is gone and I am maintaining things, not creating and innovating. I am a Starter. If I must work for someone else, I enjoy places that I can mostly control my environment, that needs some help that I can do, that I can initiate and follow through with changes, helping things function better and be creative as much as you can in an office setting.
For years I have been following this pattern. Each job ended with mostly the same result. I grew bored after there was not much more to improve, and then started dreaming about leaving and writing as my career. With my current job, I can't even muster enough energy to look forward to another "Starter" job even though I am bored and restless now. So now, I think it's time that I really do catch that dream of writing.
I won't be able to do this all at once and still maintain our lifestyle. So there are other dreams that I am taking my butterfly net to. Here's a list, though it may not be comprehensive:
- Writing/working from home full time. Will include writing articles, the great American novel, writing knitting patterns and selling things in my etsy store
- Having a decluttered home - thanks to the Fly Lady
- Maintaining a clean home - thanks to the Fly Lady
- Being fit and active - due to running
- Taking a more active role in social justice such as the oppression of women globally, which leads to a host of bad things
- Drawing closer to God in the "Interior Castle"
- Communicating better with my relationships